Peaceful On The Outside, Turmoil On The Inside

That's the way I feel right now. There are many things in life I can convince myself that I can easily do without. A car, a bungalow or condo, etc. But not for this one. I do not know how long I can hold myself. I might just crack under the turmoil. For now, I only have one thing on my mind, to go through my friend's wedding successfully tomorrow. Wanna make sure it goes smoothly for him as much as I can. It's one of the few things I can do for him as a friend. God help me...... Then what? Frankly I do not know. Maybe I do not want to know. Maybe it's better to go through each day at a time without thinking too much. I realised a new enemy that can match loneliness as well as helplessness. It's called 'aimlessness'. My goodness. How many disastrous emotions are there man?