Been feeling off today. I attribute it to the incident with my dad that happened late this morning. It's amazing how he, being in Taiwan, could have caused me so much frustration right here in Singapore. I wanna save myself from opening the wound so I shall not try to retell the story but suffice to say I felt quite hurt from the incident. I struggle within cos on one hand I have the intention of telling him off and setting things straight and yet on the other I am not too sure I am doing the right thing. Guess hanging between the two has caused me to be in a state of limbo. I haven't had a moment of peace since. I really feel me bottling it up is not gonna help in our relationship and yet I seem to fear the repercussions of what I intend to do.
Right now, I already have a number of stuff on my mind and having recovered somewhat from a super big episode in my life, I really don't feel I am up to handling anything pertaining to this issue. I guess God pretty much warned me about my day when I just could not move on from meditating James 1:2-3 and Romans 5:3-4 which talks about trials and tribulations. It's funny cos I simply cannot imagine me going up to my dad and telling him straight in the face (or even over the line) that what he said hurt me. It's tough to say the least. Sigh. Maybe I should just start being upfront with my feelings with him whenever I can. If he accepts me, so be it. If he doesn't, that's just too bad. Hmmmm, decisions decisions decisions!
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