Feeling kind of low right now. Thinking of the meaning of life. Most will call it mid life crisis. Whatever I call it, the feeling's the same. There seems to be nothing to life but mere existence. Maybe I need a partner. Someone to distract me from facing this emptiness inside. The thought of me going through this year after year sounds really scary. This is certainly not what I want to live for. How long can I take this? I do not know. The temptation's there to go out and buy Buffy season 4 onwards. Think I can buy a little time with it. Maybe more Wii games. But what after that? In my life of trying to search for significance, I know when all these die down, the emptiness is still audible.
Sometimes knowing too much is not a good thing. It brings with it more responsibility. What makes it scarier is when you know what needs to be done but you do not have the strength nor the motivation to do it. So what is the conclusion? I do not know. All I know now is to do what I need to and want to do and see what happens next. So next, gym!
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